


Of Games and Groupchats

by MercurialComet



Series: OGAG Canon [1]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Break Up, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Changing Relationships, Chatlogs, Developing Relationship, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Established Relationship, Everyone is Queer, F/F, F/M, Fox is blind, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Intersex Sun, M/M, Multi, Oscar has this, Other, Second chapter starts romance and shit, Trans Sun, Tyrians last name is apparently Callows, switches between Oscar(he/him) and Oz(they/them), this is purely plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-22
Updated: 2017-10-28
Packaged: 2019-01-21 03:39:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12448902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercurialComet/pseuds/MercurialComet
Summary: Pyrrha hosts Beacon's 2nd Annual Groupchat Games. This is it's story.





	1. The Rules

**Author's Note:**

> This is pure crack with a d20 for randomness.
> 
> EDIT: Fair Warning: This used to be crack with a d20 for randomness. Now it is somewhat a story. Have fun.

**[Pyrrha has created group: Competition]**

**[Pyrrha has added: Little Red, Ice Queen, Black Cat, Armed and Dangerous, Joan of Arc, Lie Ren, and Boop]**

Lie Ren:Oh no.

Joan of Arc **:** ITS HERE

Boop **:** ITS FINALLY HERE. ROUND TWO BITCHES.

Little Red **:** i w o n ' t b e o u t f i r s t t h i s t i m e .

ARMed and Dangerous: is THIS really all the people going to be involved in the Great Beacon Games?

Pyyrha: First off, this isn't a school-sanctioned activity, this was created by you being drunk during finals. Secondly, I, being the moderator and referee, will not be participating.

ARMed and Dangerous: right.

**[ARMed and Dangerous has added: Sapphora, Dust Bunny, Yastu, Fox-Eyed]**

ARMed and Dangerous: Anyone else?

 **[Black Cat has added: Sunny Side Up, Blue-Haired Siren, Lost Boy, and Sage]**  

Little Red: wtf, how could you guys forget about my frens

**[Little Red has added: Penny for Your Thoughts and The Wiz]**

The Wiz: RED

Little Red: OSCAR

The Wiz: OZ*

Little Red: kay thats fair

Yatsu: What's going on here?

ARMed and Dangerous: wanna join the greatest competition ever? It's for 500 Lien.

Sunny Side Up: My body is ready and willing.

Yatsu: Can't. I'm too busy.

Sage: I have doctor finals.

Penny for Your Thoughts: I'm literally drowning in code and gears over here, so no.

Pyyrha: Anyone else not joining?

Pyyrha: Ok

**[Pyyrha has created permissions: Referees]**

**[Pyrrha has added: Pyrrha, Yatsu, Sage, and Penny for Your Thoughts to Referees]**

Pyyrha: Now that that's done, here are the rules:

Pyyrha: There will be a series of competitions, both online and in real life. How well you do in each competition determines how many points you get, and after every competition, the person with the lowest cumulative score will be eliminated. The winner is the last one standing.

Blue-Haired Siren: Is the reward System Pays For Itself?

Pyyrha: Yes.

Lost Boy: Ok, I'm dropping out then.

Ice Queen: I have no clue why I'm not quitting.

Black Cat: Because you have enough money to where if you end up last, paying won't be an issue?

Ice Queen: Tru.

The Wiz: Ok, wait. What's System Pays For Itself?

Little Red: OMG, i forgot u weren't here last year.

Dust Bunny: Basically, if you suck, don't suck too much, and even if you don't win, you still get some money.

The Wiz: Oh, nice.

Pyyrha: Everyone good?

Black Cat: Wait, how will Fox be able to play?

Fox-Eyed: I'll be fine, trust me.

Pyyrha: Okay. Now, the first challenge is taking this Harry Potter Quiz. Screenshot me your results, every question you get right is ten points. If there is a tie, extra points will be added to the first person who sent me there scores. Ready.

Pyyrha: Set.

Pyyrha: [HPQuiz.goto](https://www.theguardian.com/books/2017/jun/26/harry-potter-quiz-20-years-20-questions)

Pyyrha: Go.


	2. Quiz Corrections and Nora wins 20 Lien

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case your confused over names:  
> Ruby-Little Red  
> Weiss-Ice Queen  
> Yang-ARMed and Dangerous  
> Blake-Black Cat  
> Pyyrha-Pyyrha  
> Jaune-Jaune of Arc  
> Ren-Lie Ren  
> Nora-Boop  
> Coco-Sapphora  
> Velvet-Dust Bunny  
> Yatsu-Yatsu  
> Fox-Fox-Eyed  
> Sun-Sunny Side Up  
> Neptune-Blue-Haired Siren  
> Scarlet-Lost Boy  
> Sage-Sage  
> Penny-Penny for Your Thoughts  
> Oscar/Oz-The Wiz

Ice Queen:  **Screenshot(5/20)**

Black Cat: **Screenshot(14/20)**

Pyyrha: Currently the scores are: Blake-140, Weiss-50.

Lost Boy: Wow, I did not expect Blake to be a Potterhead.

Black Cat: Harry Potter has a wonderful social structure set up that shows both the great and ugly sides of society, public figures, and government. Of course I would fucking love it.

Boop:  **Screenshot(2/20)**

Boop: fuck, not again.

Pyyrha: Nora...

Pyyrha: How?

Pyyrha: If yoou guessed you'd at least get 5 right statistically.

Ice Queen: This just in, the great Pyyrha Nikos just made a typo.

Black Cat: No way, I don't believe it. /s

Lost Boy: Here's the great thing tho Nora, ur beating math.

Boop: tell that to my C in calculus.

Little Red:  **Screenshot(16/20)**

Sapphora:  **Screenshot(15/20)**

Black Cat: HOW

Sapphora: so close.

Little Red: HA

Pyyrha: Current Scores: Ruby-160, Coco-150, Blake-140, Weiss-50, Nora-20.

Little Red: Weiss! You're letting down team RWBY!

Ice Queen: First of all, what team?

Boop: WILDCATS

Ice Queen: Second of all, I'm not even last.

Boop: *shot in the heart*

Ice Queen: And third of all, if that's pronounced like your name, I'm coming over there and punching you.

The Wiz: I think the fuck not, you trick ass bitch.

Ice Queen: ...Did you... seriously take time away from the quiz in order to type that?

The Wiz: Yes, because I am a Loyal Friend. 

**PM between Boop and The Wiz**

Boop: Why are you lying you little pinning...

Boop: liar?

The Wiz: fuck, is it that obvious?

Boop: No, but thanks for winning me 20 Lien.

**"Competition"**

Boop: @ARMed and Dangerous@ u owe me 20 Lien now.

Dust Bunny:  **Screenshot(8/20)**

Lie Ren:  **Screenshot(4/20)**

ARMed and Dangerous:  **Screenshot(8/20)**

ARMed and Dangerous: Noted.

ARMed and Dangerous: And ouch, Renora isn't doing so hot.

Lie Ren: Renora?

ARMed and DAngerous: Yeah, your ship name?

ARMed and DAngerous: Like how Jaune and Pyyrha's is Arkos, and Blake and I's is Bumbleby (or Bumblebee?)

Sunny Side Up: **Screenshots(14/20)**

Blue-Haired Siren: **Screenshots(9/20)**

Blue-Haired Siren: ugh, sun did better than me.

Sunny Side Up: well now i know who's sleeping on the couch tonight

**PM between Black Cat and Sunny Side Up**

Black Cat: Does this mean you two are finally together?

Sunny Side Up: no. i told you blake, he's not going to feel anything for me, we're just best friends.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Ice Queen**

Blue-Haired Siren: no weiss, we aren't together, we're just friends who are very comfortable in our sexuality.

**"Competition"**

Pyyrha: The current scores are: 

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Ruby | 160  
Coco | 150  
Blake | 141  
Sun | 140  
Neptune | 90  
Velvet | 81  
Yang | 80  
Weiss | 50  
Ren | 40  
Nora | 20  
Jaune | 0  
Fox | 0  
Oz | 0  
  
My thanks to Penny for helping to automate the system

Penny for Your Thoughts: No problem!

Jaune of Arc:  **Screenshots(7/20)**

Jaune of Arc: Hey, I could've helped you!

Pyyrha: You're biased.

Pyyrha: And we may be dating, but I will not let you be arrested for any sort of collusion.

ARMed and Dangerous: That's actually relationship goals right there.

The Wiz:  **Screenshots(14/20)**

Sunny Side Up: wow, a lot people got exactly 14 right.

Black Cat: Sun, only 3 of us have gotten exactly 14 right.

Sunny Side Up: Yes, but because there are only 13 of us, the percentage magnitude is greater isn't it Ms.English and Sociology Major?

Black Cat: Boo, you whore.

Sunny Side Up: Back on your mean girls quotes too.

Fox-Eyed:  **Screenshots(18/20)**

Little Red: WHY GOD?!

Pyyrha: While Ruby is having her mental breakdown, here are the scores:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Fox | 180  
Ruby | 160  
Coco | 150  
Blake | 142  
Sun | 141  
Oz | 140  
Neptune | 90  
Velvet | 81  
Yang | 80  
Jaune | 70  
Weiss | 50  
Ren | 40  
Nora | 20  
  
@Boop@, I hate to tell you this but, you're the first one out.

Boop: well, it was fun yall, but now I'll be in debt for the rest of my life.

Pyyrha: Yeah, that reminds me, it's 1000 Lien in that exercise app we all have.

The Wiz: Why /do/ we all have that?

Lie Ren: Because the app pays for each step you take and as broke college students we do a lot of walking.

ARMed and Dangerous: rt

Boop: I WONT BE IN DEBT FOR MY WHOLE LIFE

Jaune of Arc: Doesn't Nora have like, a million Lien on that app?

Lie Ren: She keeps it for whenever I want anything.

ARMed and Dangerous: #goals

Little Red: So,,, for our single selves, how is the score like through Teams?

Pyyrha: @Penny for Your Thoughts@

Penny for Your Thoughts: On it!

Little Red: I make a motion to form a Penny Protection Squad.

The Wiz: Seconded

Sunny Side Up: Thirded

Ice Queen: Fourthed

ARMed and Dangerous: Wow, even Weiss agrees.

Fox-Eyed: Yeah, that's new.

Ice Queen: What do you mean that's new? Penny is my aro-ace buddy, I've gotta protect her.

Lie Ren: Wait, Fox, how are you typing

Fox-Eyed: Jaune made me a braille-based keyboard to type with! I just have to hit the screen like the alphabet and I can send messages. The only problem is i can't capitalize, and so only the first word of every sentence is, even if i type in a name.

Penny for Your Thoughts: It's not perfect, but:

Team | Total  
---|---  
RWBY | 432  
JNR | 130  
SN | 231  
CVF | 410  
O | 140  
  
Jaune of Arc: How is it that Oscar was able to get more points than us three combined?

The Wiz: First off, it's Oz right now. They/them. Nice to meet you.

The Wiz: Secondly, y'all just suck lmao.

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Little Red**

Little Red: Yang, I'm so screwed

ARMed and Dangerous: Wow, you have it bad, don't ya?

**"Competition"**

Pyyrha: Now go to bed. The next challenge starts at noon, and you're going to want your energy.


	3. Papa- Paparazzi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AKA welcome to the next driving plot force

**"Competition" - 6 AM**

Pyyrha: !airhorn

ARMed and Dangerous: Pyyrha Nikos I will end you.

Little Red: can you not use uppercase letters my head hurts

Yatsu: Hey Pyyrha,

Yatsu: Could you do something different next time?

Yatsu: Something that doesn't scare my blind boyfriend?

Yatsu: You monster

Pyyrha: Oh fuck. I'm sorry, I forgot.

Black Cat: I nearly got kicked out of my class what the fuck why.

Lie Ren: Same

Sunny Side Up: you guys have classes this early?

Lie Ren: Yes.

Black Cat: Yeah, why don't you?

Sunny Side Up: because i love myself.

Black Cat: doyou.jpg

Sunny Side Up: listen, i was hungover

Pyyrha: Anyway, apologies given, the next challenge is a game of paparazzi.

Blue-Haired Siren: welp, we've lost.

Pyyrha: What do you mean?

Blue-Haired Siren: ren is an actual ninja and blake is always camera ready

Blue-Haired Siren: and by that i mean always ready to avoid a camera.

ARMed and Dangerous: That's true, I even hid a camera in my prosthetic and she still sniffed it out and avoided the picture.

Pyyrha: Well, I could just go ahead and eliminate you now...

Blue-Haired Siren: Who's the celebrity I have my camera lens crystal clear and my hands are steady as shit.

Pyyrha: That's the spirit.

Pyyrha: I've sent you each your individual targets, the game starts at 8 am. You must send me a picture of that person and that person only, no cropping a photo. Pictures cannot be taken in the communal area or at any school sanctioned activity.

Boop: Even in class?

Pyyyrha: Especially in class.

ARMed and Dangerous: I thought you said it started at noon?

Pyyrha: I lied.

**[Black Cat has created group "Neptune and Sun"]**

**[Black Cat has added: ARMed and Dangerous, Little Red, Ice Queen, Team JNPR, Team CFVY, The Wiz]**

Black Cat: Sun and Neptune.

ARMed and Dangerous: Need to fuck

Little Red: There is a child here

ARMed and Dangerous: I said what I said

Pyyrha: Now remember, no sex in the communal area.

Black Cat: They don't even live in the pods, they have that small apartment to themselves.

Pyyrha: I still stand by what I said.

**"Competition" - 8:30am**

Dust Bunny:  **tooeasy.jpg**

Pyyrha: Jaune is out... not even an hour into it.

Jaune of Arc: Listen, I didn't read the chat and Velvet said she needed help with carrying something.

Pyyrha: Well, here's the score:

Name | Total Score | Competition 1 | Competition 2  
---|---|---|---  
Fox | 180 | 180 |    
Ruby | 160 | 160 |    
Coco | 150 | 150 |    
Blake | 142 | 142 |    
Sun | 141 | 141 |    
Oz | 140 | 140 |    
Neptune | 90 | 90 |    
Velvet | 81 | 81 |    
Yang | 80 | 80 |    
Jaune | 80 | 70 | 10  
Weiss | 50 | 50 |    
Ren | 40 | 40 |    
  
ARMed and Dangerous: 10 Lien that Jaune is out

Pyyrha: 10 Lien he isn't

Jaune of Arc: Ahh, babe.

The Wiz: #goals

Little Red: Don't you have class now Oscar?

The Wiz: It's Port, he's busy telling us his life story, I'm fine.

Little Red: Okay, just be careful.

Lie Ren: Speaking of being careful,

Lie Ren:  **caughtasneakylittlefox.jpg**

Lie Ren: To whoever his target was, you're welcome.

Pyyrha: Fox is officially out.

Sunny Side Up: @Ice Queen@ I have to talk to you quickly.

**PM between Ice Queen and Sunny Side Up**

Ice Queen: What's up?

Sunny Side Up: Not here, in person. This is serious

Ice Queen: I know, you're using capitalization for once. Anyway, meet me at Dust Til Dawn in 5 minutes.

**"Team SSSN"**

Sage:You're tricking Weiss to get her out aren't you Sun.

Sunny Side Up: nope, what do you take me for. a winner?

Lost Boy: I'm so proud of you my boi.

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Black Cat**

ARMed and Dangerous: I'm not your target right?

Black Cat: Yep. Same goes for me?

ARMed and Dangerous: Yep. Wanna just stay in the pod area?

Black Cat: Never get out, I like it.

Black Cat: Let's try and get Sun and Neptune together while we're at it.

ARMed and Dangerous: Got it.

**"Competition"**

Sunny Side Up:  **oops.jpg**

Ice Queen: I WAS BETRAYED. MY TRUST WAS ANNIHILATED.

Ice Queen: MY BONDS WITH THE WORLD HAVE BEEN SIGNIFICANTLY WEAKENED.

Pyyrha: Weiss has been eliminated.

Pyyrha: Scores:

Name | Total Score | Competition 1 | Competition 2  
---|---|---|---  
Fox | 200 | 180 | 20  
Ruby | 160 | 160 |    
Coco | 150 | 150 |    
Blake | 142 | 142 |    
Sun | 141 | 141 |    
Oz | 140 | 140 |    
Neptune | 90 | 90 |    
Velvet | 81 | 81 |    
Yang | 80 | 80 |    
Jaune | 80 | 70 | 10  
Weiss | 80 | 50 | 30  
Ren | 40 | 40 |    
  
 

Lost Boy: Hey Ren. Something tells me that after this competition, you won't have to worry about elimination.

ARMed and Dangerous: Holy shit.

Little Red: What?

Black Cat:  **howinthefuckdidthatwork.jpg**

ARMed and Dangerous: We just fucking merced Neptune. 

Pyyrha: Questionable methods aside, that does count, and Neptune is out.

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Fox | 200  
Ruby | 160  
Coco | 150  
Blake | 142  
Sun | 141  
Oz | 140  
Neptune | 130  
Velvet | 81  
Yang | 80  
Jaune | 80  
Weiss | 80  
Ren | 40  
  
Blue-Haired Siren: i. i don't know how to feel about this.

Sunny Side Up: I'm on my way.

ARMed and Dangerous: #goals

Blue-Haired Siren: We're not dating.

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Black Cat - 1pm**

ARMed and Dangerous: Tomorrow is Saturday right?

Black Cat: Yeah.

ARMed and Dangerous: So Sun has wrestling practice?

Black Cat:...

Black Cat: Yeah...

ARMed and Dangerous: Ok. So here's what we do.


	4. Yang will not take no for an answer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Planning and other things. The game of paparazzi continues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't be afraid to comment and kudos! i love validation!

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Black Cat.**

Black Cat: So that's the plan?

ARMed and Dangerous: Yes. I'll let you know when we start

**"Competition" - 6pm**

Dust Bunny: **victimnumber2.jpg**

Sapphora: Et tu Brute?

Ice Queen: That's not how you use it correctly.

Pyyrha: Coco is out.

Sapphora: ET TU BRUTE!

Ice Queen: Why do I even bohter?

Sapphora: bohter

Dust Bunny: bohter

Sunny Side Up: bohter

Fox-Eyed: Bohter

Ice Queen: This is aphobia

Penny for Your Thoughts: bohter

Yatsu: Still sure about that aphobia claim Weiss?

Ice Queen: PENNY

Penny for Your Thoughts: I'm sorry Weiss, but it was too funny!

Sunny Side Up: wow, imagine being as extra as weiss though.

Black CAt: Sun, you're the epitome of extra.

Sunny Side Up: no im not???

Black Cat:  [Are you sure?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=voUOGwWlA7g)

Sunny Side Up: That proves nothing

Blue-Haired Siren: [Are you so sure?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qVkgQ9eYYo)

Sunny Side Up: NEPTUNE

Ice Queen: oh my god

Pyyrha: Wow

Lost Boy: Oh yeah, I remember that

Sunny Side Up: lets not talk about that part of my life

Lost Boy: I whooped your arse in a millisecond for doing that.

Sunny Side Up: ok, ive made a few mistakes, lets move on.

Lie Ren: Speaking of moving on....

Lie Ren:  **caughthimsulking.jpg**

Sunny Side Up: That Doesn't Count I Was In A State Of Emotional Distress

Pyyrha: It still counts Sun. I'm sorry, the rules are hard, but they are the rules.

Blue-Haired Siren: okay then alec lightwood. sun, i'm on my way with ice cream, cuddles, and an apology.

Sunny Side Up: cant wait

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Black Cat**

Black Cat: Stay strong Yang. Remember the plan.

ARMed and Dangerous: Start the plan early.

Black Cat: Ok. I message Sage, Scarlet, Weiss, and JNPR. You message Ruby, Oscar, Penny, and CFVY.

ARMed and Dangerous: Ok.

ARMed and Dangerous: Also, how do you know it's Oscar today?

Black Cat: Your sister made him bracelets, he switches them all the time to match.

ARMed and Dangerous: Damn, she's really serious about her crush then.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Boop: Hey

Boop: um

Boop: You know that I would never willingly hurt you right?

Lie Ren: Yes?

Boop: well

Boop: um

Boop: You know how you're biromantic?

Lie Ren: Yes...

Boop: Well, I think I'm aromantic.

Boop: Ren?

Boop: If you're breaking up with me, at least say so goddammit.

**"Competition" - 10pm**

The Wiz:  **imsorryruby.jpg**

Little Red: YOU WITCH

Pyyrha: Ruby's out. Here are the scores:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Ruby | 220  
Sun | 201  
Fox | 200  
Coco | 200  
Blake | 142  
Oz | 140  
Neptune | 130  
Velvet | 81  
Yang | 80  
Jaune | 80  
Weiss | 80  
Ren | 40  
  
The Wiz: If I had any other option, I would've done it.

Little Red: So ambushing me in front of my last class was your final choice?

The Wiz: Yes.

Little Red: At least you're honest.

**"Neptune and Sun" - 12am**

Ice Queen: Is everyone in place?

Boop: I'm here with the laundry basket.

Lie Ren: I have the hiding spot at the pods ready.

Pyyrha: I have everyone's tentative agreement to not take photos of each other for the game.

Black Cat: I have the key to their apartment.

Little Red: I have Sage and Scarlet's excited agreement not to help the two.

ARMed and Dangerous: And I have the final piece of the plan.

Dust Bunny: I'm here to help keep everyone quiet.

Fox-Eyed: And i'm the watchman. For some weird reason.

The Wiz: Is that a blind joke?

Fox-Eyed: Yes. Yes it is.

Dust Bunny: Hey Fox, remember to put your earbuds on, I can hear your phone reading the messages out loud and we wouldn't want Sun and Neptune to hear them too.

Fox-Eyed. Thanks. @Yatsu@ Where did i put my earbuds?

Yatsu: I'm on my way.

ARMed and Dangerous: #goals

Little Red: Wait Weiss, what're you doing here?

Ice Queen: I'm the getaway driver.

Jaune of Arc: Don't you think you guys are doing too much?

ARMed and Dangerous: Coming from the guy who was literally flirted on by the school valedictorian and didn't even fucking realize it.

Jaune of Arc: ...

Jaune of Arc: Noted.

ARMed and Dangerous: Now let's get started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're gonna want to watch the video that Neptune posts or else you'll be confused by minor details later on.  
> If you're uncertain:  
> Watermelondrea (the girl that gets whooped)-Sun  
> Michelle (the girl that whoops Watermelondrea)-Scarlet  
> Grapeangelashandra ("You got all the answers dont you bitch?")-Neptune
> 
> Again, please comment and kudo! Also yell at me on my tumblr: aprofessionalfan


	5. The Best Laid Plans (may backfire)

**"Neptune and Sun" - 2am**

ARMed and Dangerous: WE DID IT!

Black Cat: That took an hour and a half too long.

Pyyrha: Well, we couldn't really see, and we had to be careful with where we shined our flashlights.

Black Cat: True.

Ice Queen: Don't forget the pizza delivery guy who was super loud that Fox and I had to shush.

Fox-Eyed: I still don't know why that paused the plan for 20 minutes.

ARMed and Dangerous: Better Safe Than Sorry.

Ice Queen: Speaking of our two resident idiots, remember the video that Neptune sent in yesterday?

Little Red: I wish I could forget it.

Ice Queen: Well, how does Neptune know the exact way that Sun /ya'know/?

Black Cat: You don't think...

Boop: No way...

ARMed and Dangerous: Those little shits.

**"Competition" - 2:30am**

Pyyrha: Okay, I know there was some form of a truce, but Oscar, Yang, and Velvet have been eliminated, in that order.

The Wiz: How.

Dust Bunny: I thought I heard camera clicks.

ARMed and Dangerous: But it's too dark!

Lie Ren: Unless you have your engineering friends rig your Scroll camera to night mode.

Black Cat: You too? Penny did it for me.

ARMed and Dangerous: ET TU BRUTE

Ice Queen: YOURE NOT EVEN USING IT RIGHT

Sunny Side Up: can yall stop yelling it's too early

Blue-Haired Siren: sun go back to bed you have an early wrestling practice tomorrow remember

Sunny Side Up; k. night yall

Black Cat: Good night Sun.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Lie Ren: Nora, I'm not mad. I promise, it's just me being weird again. Let's talk about this after I get some sleep and beat Blake in paparazzi, okay?

Boop: Okay Ren.

**PM between ARMed and Dangerous and Black Cat**

Black Cat: Neptune even knows Sun's schedule, tomorrow is either gonna go really well, or really poorly.

Black Cat: What did you even do anyway Yang? You never told me that part.

ARMed and Dangerous: Oh, you'll see.

**"Competition" - 5:50 am**

Sapphora: Ok, no offense but how did Ruby get into Beacon our year, and Oscar get in 1 year behind us? They're both too young to be in their respective grades.

Little Red: Goodwitch caught a look at my grades and SAT and almost immediately I was at Beacon with Yang.

The Wiz: It's Oz now, and Ozpin owed my family a favor, saw my academic record, and fucking leapt at the opportunity to have what he called a 'prodigy child' at Beacon.

Sapphora: So you both got recruited?

The Wiz: Yep.

Sapphora: Do you feel bad leaving your high schools behind?

Little Red: I still talk to my friends, so no, I'm fine.

The Wiz: My high school can rot.

Sunny Side Up: Okay, not to barge in, but what the fuck happened to my clothes?

Sunny Side Up: **wheredtheygo.jpg**

Little Red: Do you just have nothing?!

Sunny Side Up: I only have socks, underwear, shoes, my two wrestling singlets and a sweatshirt/hoodie.

Sunny Side Up: And I need to be at practice in 10 minutes.

Sunny Side Up: Fuck it, bye.

**7:00 am**

Lie Ren:  **iwin.jpg**

Black Cat: Nice backflip so I couldn't take your picture.

Jaune of Arc: Wow, you have a really steady hand Ren.

Lie Ren: Thank you.

Pyyrha: Ren wins! Final score:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Blake | 252  
Ruby | 230  
Oz | 220  
Sun | 201  
Fox | 200  
Coco | 200  
Velvet | 181  
Yang | 170  
Ren | 160  
Neptune | 130  
Jaune | 80  
Weiss | 80  
  
Ice Queen: Um, what do we do for a tie?

Pyyrha: @Penny for Your Thoughts@

Penny for Your Thoughts: I'll have it break ties by whoever did better in the last competition, hold on for one second!

Penny for Your Thoughts: Here's the official one

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Blake | 252  
Ruby | 230  
Oz | 220  
Sun | 201  
Coco | 200  
Fox | 200  
Velvet | 181  
Yang | 170  
Ren | 160  
Neptune | 130  
Weiss | 80  
Jaune | 80  
  
Jaune of Arc: Aw, I'm eliminated

ARMed and Dangerous: Pyyrha you owe me 10 Lien.

Pyyrha: Noted.

Blue-Haired Siren: Why the fuck are all my pants spandex?

The Wiz: Pic or it didn't happen

Blue-Haired Siren:  **um...why.jpg**

The Wiz: Break the gender roles, idk y u did it.

Ice Queen: Hey, you probably have the legs to pull it off.

Blue-Haired Siren: I have go to work in an hour.

ARMed and Dangerous: New uniform.

Black Cat: Try the black pair, those match up with what you usually have to wear for work.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Boop: Do you feel like talking Ren?

Lie Ren: Sure.

Boop: Well. First off, um. I don't think that a romantic relationship would work now.

Lie Ren: That makes sense. Friends?

Boop: Friends. Now, since the best relationship you will ever have ended due to unfortunate circumstances out of your control and not your fault, is there anyone else you have a crush on?

Lie Ren: Well would you look at the time, I'm late for my shift at Tukson's gtg bye.

Boop: IM GOING TO FIND OUT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER REN. DONT TEST ME

**"Competition" - 8:00 am**

ARMed and Dangerous: Okay, so you guys know how Neptune works at the coffee shop we all go to?

Lost Boy: Yes?

ARMed and Dangerous:  **myboyneplookinlikeaSNACK.jpg**

Black Cat: Holy shit

Ice Queen: This just in: Neptune Vasiliass does not skip leg day.

Sapphora: Wow, he set up that outfit well. Color scheme on point.

Black Cat: Hey, isn't Sun's practice over?

ARMed and Dangerous: That quickly?

Black Cat: It was a one-on-one with coach practice.

Black Cat: Nvm, he just walked in.

Black Cat:  **dork#2.jpg**

Sapphora: Damn, black and gold fits Sun well.

ARMed and Dangerous: Not as well as that singlet does though.

Little Red: YANG

ARMed and Dangerous: Change the first letter to a B and that's what these two dorks are gonna be doing later.

Ice Queen: Goddammit Yang...

Sunny Side Up: we're not dating. also, thanks for messing with my clothes.

Pyyrha: Considering what the next challenge is, you might be glad for your current attire.

Pyyrha: @everbody. For the next challenge, you have to try to make Goodwitch blush. I have gotten her permission to be a part of this challenge and she can still give detention. You will get 3 tries, where I'll rank you on a scale of 1 to 20, then Goodwitch will also rank you on a scale of 1 to 20 depending on how well she thought you did. You have till 5pm to have your strategies down, and we will go in order of the current leader board.

Pyyrha: Good luck.

Little Red: You Monster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys want me to write "missing scenes" (aka, actual real life scenes) just let me know in the comments. Also, if you want to try and write it, please do! (Just remember to gift it to me pls)


	6. Challenge: Make Goodwitch Blush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The race to make Goodwitch blush begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls remember to comment/kudo  
> You have a question? comment  
> You like the fic? pls tell me  
> You want to write a bonus scene? let me know  
> You want me to write a bonus scene? hit me the fuck up

Pyyrha: Blake's up first.

ARMed and Dangerous: Good luck babe!

Ice Queen: How well do you think that Blake's going to do?

Little Red: Honestly, I have no clue.

Sapphora: Goodwitch only has two moods: Anger and Apathy.

Jaune of Arc: rt

Blue-Haired Siren: rt

ARMed and Dangerous: I wonder how she'll react to Neptune and Sun.

Sunny Side Up: i bet you regret stealing our clothes now don't you?

ARMed and Dangerous:  **nope.jpg**

Sunny Side Up: i'm not sure if i should be angry or proud.

Blue-Haired Siren: Is that more spandex?

ARMed and Dangerous: MAYBE IT IS. Maybe its Maybelline

Pyyrha: Blake has scored a 9. Ruby?

Little Red: I'm fucked.

**6:00pm**

Pyyrha: Neptune, your second try.

Sunny Side Up: I wonder what he's gonna do.

Little Red: You would like to know.

ARMed and Dangerous: THATS MY SISTER. YOU GO GIRL.

Black Cat: WORK IT BITCH

Ice Queen: YOU GO LEILENE

Sapphora: Omg, I loved that show.

The Wiz: Season 1 was the only good season though

The Wiz: "Without crying like a little baby"

Sapphora: "You had to come here as the wh*re of Charm School."

Ice Queen: "I can make you a lace-front for that though."

The Wiz: "I see you found your dress. I should've hidden it better."

Sapphora: "Leilene worked her magic, I was like, 'You go bitch, you're fierce' ".

Ice Queen: "You are tore up, from the floor up!"

The Wiz: "That shit was faker than her nasty ass weave!"

ARMed and Dangerous: Wow, that show sounds exciting.

Pyyrha: Holy shit.

ARMed and Dangerous: I know right Pyyrha?

Pyyrha: Neptune gets a 20.

Black Cat: WHAT

Pyyrha: Goodwitch fucking burned.

ARMed and Dangerous: Neptune what did you do?

Blue-Haired Siren: youll never find out

Pyyrha: I wish I had my camera.

Dust Bunny: Hey could you stop stealing my brand??? thanks.

Penny for Your Thoughts: What room are you guys in?

Pyyrha: B116, South Building. Why?

Penny for Your Thoughts:  **noreasonatall.vid**

Blue-Haired Siren: shit

ARMed and Dangerous: Holy shit Neptune

Little Red:  **has** **pressed play on Sexy Noises.**

Ice Queen: YOU GO LEILENE

The Wiz: WORK IT BITCH

Black Cat: I'm fucking shook

Ice Queen: HE FUCKING PUT ON A SHOW

Sapphora: It was classy as shit

Dust Bunny: It was gentlemanly as fuck

ARMed and Dangerous: And when he was only in those leggings and still made a motion to take them off, OH MY GOD

Black Cat: Pyyrha got a fucking nosebleed.

Sapphora: Shit, me too.

Lost Boy:^

Fox-Eyed: I can't see it (duh), but the way the yatsu is telling me what's going on, i'm going to assume it was legendary.

ARMed and Dangerous: OH BOY WAS IT

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: holy shit dude youre ripped

Blue-Haired Siren: thanks bro

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Boop: Why are you blushing?

Lie Ren: It's hot in this room.

**PM between Black Cat and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: BLAKE IM FUCKED SEND HELP

Black Cat: do the same and pm penny to leak it "accidentally"

Sunny Side Up: where would i be without you

Black Cat: In a fucking ditch.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Ice Queen**

Blue-Haired Siren: WEISS HE COMPLIMENTED ME SEND HELP

Ice Queen: Keep on wearing leggings. Try seducing him.

Blue-Haired Siren: If this doesn't work I'm murdering you.

Ice Queen: It should work, it's how my sister's best friend got his boyfriend.

Ice Queen: Also, it's my turn, bye.

**"Competition" - 8:00 pm**

Pyyrha: It's over and both Neptune and Sun need to go to church.

Sunny Side Up: I wasn't that bad

Pyyrha: @Penny for Your Thoughts@

Penny for Your Thoughts:  **yesyouwere.vid**

Black Cat: YOU PICKED HER UP?!

ARMed and Dangerous: Took the fucking straps off of your singlet!

The Wiz: YOU FUCKING LEGEND

Pyyrha: Anyway, here are the final scores for this game:

Name | Total  
---|---  
Yang | 58  
Ruby | 52  
Neptune | 51  
Ren | 51  
Sun | 51  
Fox | 46  
Oscar/Oz | 45  
Blake | 44  
Coco | 40  
Velvet | 36  
Weiss | 28  
  
Pyyrha: We'll multiply each score by 2.5 and round up if necessary.

Black Cat: I'm nervous, I don't want to drop out of first.

Pyyrha: Competition Scores so far:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Blake | 362  
Ruby | 360  
Oscar/Oz | 333  
Sun | 329  
Yang | 315  
Fox | 315  
Coco | 300  
Ren | 288  
Velvet | 271  
Neptune | 258  
Weiss | 150  
  
I'm sorry Weiss, but you're out.

Ice Queen: Dammit.

Black Cat: Ruby.

Little Red: Yeah?

Black Cat: Back the fuck off.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Lie Ren: Fuck that was hot

Boop: REN

Lie Ren: Shit

Lie Ren: Ignore that

Boop: How about no?

Lie Ren: Fuck

Boop: So, Sun huh?

Lie Ren: It doesn't matter.

Lie Ren: He likes Neptune. 

**"Neptune and Sun"**

**[Boop has kicked Lie Ren out of the group]**

**[Boop has renamed the group to "Neptune, Sun, and possibly Ren"]**

Boop: We may have a complication.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quotes come from Charm School, one of the greatest reality shows ever. Check it out.
> 
> Also fun fact I didn't expect a ship later on to actually hit the same scores like wtf.


	7. wait what (wait what)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm running out of ideas for competitions, so if you have any ideas, please hit me up in the comment section.  
> Also, fair warning, mild sexual assault is talked about (and partially talked about incorrectly for guys), so if that messes with you, skip this chapter.

**"Competition" 12pm**

Pyyrha: Knock knock. It's a new challenge.

Blue-Haired Siren: Why.

Sunny Side Up: neptune and i's closets are still fucked up.

Black Cat: *fucking perfect

Sunny Side Up: i would like to go out in public without being catcalled

Blue-Haired Siren: A girl tried to grab my ass yesterday.

Sunny Side Up: who the fuck was it? i will end them.

Blue-Haired Siren: i'm fine sun, it doesn't matter

Black Cat: Neptune, that's sexual assault, tf you mean it doesn't matter.

Blue-Haired Siren: a guy can be sexually assaulted?

Lost Boy: Neptune....

Sage: Yes Neptune. Who told you differently?

Blue-Haired Siren: Most people in my life.

Sunny Side Up: neptune, hold up one second.

**[Sunny Side Up has created group: "No Drama, Just Info"]**

**{Sunny Side Up has added: Black Cat, Blue-Haired Siren, Ice Queen, Lost Boy, and Sage]**

Sunny Side Up: blake and weiss can you two please help this poor man?

Black Cat: 1 in 10 victims of sexual assault are male.

Ice Queen: Male college students are five times more likely to be a victim of sexual assault than non-college students.

Black Cat: Men are more likely to not report it, as society tends to demean him afterwards.

Blue-Haired Siren: I think that's enoguh.

Ice Queen: You sure?

Blue-Haired Siren: yep.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: nep?

Blue-Haired Siren: yep?

Sunny Side Up: is this about the pool?

Blue-Haired Siren: Yep.

Sunny Side Up: You wanna talk about it?

Blue-Haired Siren: Nope.

Sunny Side Up: You wanna cuddle?

Blue-Haired Siren: Yep

Sunny Side Up: Omw.

  **"Competition"**

ARMed and Dangerous: Isn't there a GSA meeting today?

Jaune of Arc:  **whoops.jpg**

Fox-Eyed: Aren't you the president?

Jaune of Arc:  **whoops.jpg**

Pyyrha: I assume I'll be seeing you all at GSA, so after the meeting we'll begin the next event at the communal area.

Blue-Haired Siren: Aye aye captain.

**"Competition" - 1pm**

Little Red: Ok, no offense but why is Cardin here?

Black Cat: What do you mean, no offense? Full offense girl, full offense

Black Cat: Although now that I think about it, why is CRDL here?

Ice Queen: Wow, the entire group is here.

The Wiz: Wow, Cardin just made a homophobic comment and immediately corrected himself.

Blue-Haired Siren: Nice.

ARMed and Dangerous: Hey, where are you and Sun?

Sunny Side Up: We're hanging out at our place for now.

Lie Ren: Stay safe and stuff, okay?

Blue-Haired Siren: Ok daddy

Lie Ren: afssagfsd

ARMed and Dangerous: Okay...

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Boop: Did you just fucking drop your phone?

**"Competition"**

ARMed and Dangerous: Well, you should've been here, apparently Russell is also trans.

The Wiz: Wait, Sun is trans?

Sunny Side Up: yep. although i am technically intersex, i grew tired of people calling me a girl, so i got top surgery and t.

Sapphora: Ok, to be fair, /I/ didn't know this.

Sunny Side Up: i rarely wear a shirt, how can you not tell.

Sapphora: Oh, so that's what those scars are! I just thought you got into a knife fight as a kid or smthng.

Black Cat:  **yourenotwrong.jpg**

Sunny Side Up: How in the FUCK did you get that picture?

Black Cat: I have my ways.

Ice Queen: Wait, if you don't mind me asking Sun, how did you have top surgery and T so early?

Sunny Side Up: There's a reason I'm a marketing major.

Little Red: hold up, Dave wants to be added in quickly, apparently he has some news.

**[Little Red has added DaveyJ]**

Blue-Haired Siren: Nice Newsies reference

DaveyJ: Thanks.

The Wiz: Spill the tea.

DaveyJ: Cardin has a crush on both Jaune and Pyyrha.

Jaune of Arc: wait what

ARMed and Dangerous: wait what

DaveyJ: Peace

**[DaveyJ has left]**

Jaune of Arc:...

Pyyrha: So, about the competition...

Sunny Side Up: neptune and i are totes a team

Blue-Haired Siren: #teamdudesintightsandreadyforfights

Sunny Side Up:  **readyaf.jpg**

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Lie Ren: Nora I'm so gay send help

**"Neptune, Sun, and possibly Ren"**

Boop:  **screenshot(324).jpg**

Boop: He has a crush on them both.

Black Cat: Yeah, I can see that.

Jaune of Arc: Makes sense.

ARMed and Dangerous: Are you sure?

Pyyrha: Yep. Just trust us.

Black Cat: Ok. So since we /know/ that Ren likes them both, and that Sun and Neptune like each other, we know that this is a Number 6 Love Triangle.

Jaune of Arc: wait what

Sage: wait what

Penny for Your Thoughts: wait what

Black Cat: [educate yoself](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TriangRelations)

ARMed and Dangerous: Anyway, the main question is do we leave it to be a number 6? Or do we interfere and make it a number 8?

Ice Queen: We don't even know if a poly relationship would even work out.

Boop: Um, yeah

Jaune of Arc: Totally

Pyyrha: We don't know if it'll work at all...

Ice Queen: wait...

Black Cat: ...

Little Red: Ms.Valkyrie

Little Red: Mr.Arc

Little Red: Ms.Nikos

Little Red: Were you four (counting Ren)

Little Red: all /together/

Little Red: at some point in time?

Jaune of Arc: If you'll excuse me, I must go do...

Jaune of Arc: ...

Ice Queen: Yes?

Black Cat: Come on now, don't give up

ARMed and Dangerous: Finish strong.

Jaune of Arc: GSA presidential things.

ARMed and Dangerous: Hey! He made it!

Pyyrha: I have to go make sure student council isn't burning down.

Boop:  I just want to leave now.

Little Red: I'm not hearing a no.

Jaune of Arc: Yeah, in freshman year we all dated each other. We only split because we realized that Pyyrha/I and Ren/Nora were doing better.

ARMed and Dangerous: So what you're saying is...

Black Cat: Ren's poly as shit

Boop: Yep. As his oldest friend, I can let you know that although he doesn't talk about his feelings at all, he generally has more than one crush at a time, and cares for a lot of people.

Pyyrha: He is super loyal though. He never cheats.

Ice Queen: This is the first time I've seen someone's ex(es) campaign for that person to be in a happy relationship.

Jaune of Arc: He deserves it.

ARMed and Dangerous: #goals

Black Cat: So, now the plan is to have Sun and Neptune catch feelings for Ren?

ARMed and Dangerous: Operation: Pack the Snack Part 2.

Boop: Ren has gymnastics practice from 12 to 3 on Tuesday.

ARMed and Dangerous: God bless fast Amazon delivery. Time to mass order some things.

Black Cat: Can't wait.

**"Competittion"**

Pyyrha: The challenge is I'll name two people and the first three who come up with a good ship name for the two, can each eliminate someone who can't.

Pyyrha: I will judge.

Pyyrha: This'll be the point breakdown:

1st | 200  
---|---  
2nd | 175  
3rd | 150  
4th | 125  
5th | 100  
6th | 75  
7th | 50  
8th | 40  
9th | 30  
10th | 25  
  
Pyyrha: First off: Blake and Weiss.

Dust Bunny: Monochrome.

Pyyrha: ok

Blue-Haired Siren: Checkmate

Pyyrha: ok

ARMed and Dangerous: Snow Clones.

Little Red: Goddammit Yang

Pyyrha: Nice reference. I'll accept it.

The Wiz: I've got nothing.

Pyyrha: Ok, Velvet, Neptune, and Ren can eliminate someone.

Dust Bunny: Oscar

The Wiz: ET TU BRUTE

Ice Queen: That's not- oh fuck it.

ARMed and Dangerous: Sun

Sunny Side Up: Welp

Blue-Haired Siren: Ruby.

Little Red: This means War.

Pyyrha: Next: Ren and Coco.

Sapphora: wtf

Lie Ren: I can't even come up with one for us.

Fox-Eyed: Chocolate Lotus.

Pyyrha: Nice! Anyone else?

Pyyrha: No?

Pyyrha: Ok, Fox, take your pick.

Fox-Eyed: Yang.

ARMed and Dangerous: That's fair.

Pyyrha: Ruby and Weiss

Ice Queen: Ruby, the best one will be our friendship name okay?

Little Red: Got it.

Blue-Haired Siren: White Rose

Black Cat: Ice Flower

Pyyrha: Both are good.

Dust Bunny: Fuck, Neptune took mine

Sapphora: Reiss/Rice

Pyyrha: You make it in on wordplay. Neptune, Blake, Coco, pick your people.

Blue-Haired Siren: Fox.

Black Cat: Velvet.

Sapphora: Ren.

Little Red: I like Ice Flower

Ice Queen: I like White Rose.

ARMed and Dangerous: Oh god, not again.

Pyyrha: Okay, now I'll only take the first two, and last place is out.

Pyyrha: Nora and I.

Blue-Haired Siren: Electromagnetism.

Pyyrha: ....

Boop: HA. I REMEMBER THAT LAB

Pyyrha: Fine.

Black Cat: Hmmm...

Black Cat: Valkos.

Pyyrha: Counts. Coco, you're out.

Sapphora: Dammit

Pyyrha: The first person to come up with a ship name next wins. Because it's the final two, you're gonna get 3 people.

Blue-Haired Siren: shit

Black Cat: fuck

Pyyrha: Nora, Penny, Neon.

Pyyrha: and yes, as in Day-Glo skater Neon.

Black Cat: wtf

Blue-Haired Siren: ...

Blue-Haired Siren: Electric Avenue?

Sunny Side Up: Holy shit

ARMed and Dangerous: Yo that's slick.

Boop: I approve

Penny for Your Thoughts: I do too.

Pyyrha: Neptune wins.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Lie Ren: holy shit he's clever too.

**"Competition"**

Pyyrha: Scores:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Blake | 537  
Neptune | 458  
Coco | 450  
Ren | 413  
Ruby | 400  
Fox | 390  
Velvet | 371  
Yang | 365  
Sun | 359  
Oscar/Oz | 358  
  
The Wiz: ONE POINT?

Sunny Side Up: Holy shit.

Pyyrha: Sorry Oscar.

The Wiz: It's fine, now I can take Ruby on a date

Little Red: wait what

ARMed and Dangerous: wait what

The Wiz: wait what

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: Good job bro.

Blue-Haired Siren: Thanks

Sunny Side Up: So, are you feeling any better?

Blue-Haired Siren: Still wanna cuddle?

Sunny Side Up: Yes

Blue-Haired Siren: Come over here ya big softie.

Sunny Side Up: I love you

Blue-Haired Siren: wait what

Sunny Side Up: wait what

Blue-Haired Siren: ...

Blue-Haired Siren: we have a lot to talk about do we?

Sunny Side Up: yep

Blue-Haired Siren: omw.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off: Sun's gender history/status is not a slight against intersex or trans people, this is just one of a million different circumstances that can occur and are not indicative of the whole intersex or trans communities
> 
> Feel free to shout at me in the comments or via tumblr: aprofessionalfan


	8. Operation: Golden Lotus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the OT3  
> Also the beginning of angst and actual plot  
> Also, talk of an abusive relationship and domestic abuse case at the end.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: So lets get this straight.

Blue-Haired Siren: This is the 21st time today, and this isn't straight.

Sunny Side Up: Shush.

Sunny Side Up: You like me.

Sunny Side Up: Romantically and

Sunny Side Up: /sexually/

Blue-Haired Siren: you dork.

Sunny Side Up: And you want to be in a relationship with me.

Blue-Haired Siren: Yes.

Sunny Side Up: WhY?

Blue-Haired Siren: Scroll up.

Sunny Side Up: ...

Sunny Side Up: Is every word of that true?

Blue-Haired Siren: It was true the first, second, third, fourth, fifth- **[Expand Message]**  and seventy-fifth time I sent it.  

Blue-Haired Siren: And it's true now, the seventy fucking sixth time I've sent it.

Blue-Haired Siren: Now come back to bed and cuddle.

Sunny Side Up: ...

Blue-Haired Siren: what?

Sunny Side Up: how did we not realize this earlier? we literally sleep in the same bed.

Blue-Haired Siren: welp.

Blue-Haired Siren: we're dumb

Sunny Side Up: I love us though

Blue-Haired Up: So do I.

Sunny Side Up: <3

Blue-Haired Up: <3

**"Neptune, Sun, and possibly Ren." 2:40pm**

Boop: Ren's gymnastics practice is almost over

ARMed and Dangerous: Okay, are we all clear with the plan?

Little Red: somewhat? I'm just supposed to steal Neptune's keys right?

Black Cat: No, you steal Sun's keys, /I/ steal Neptune's keys.

Ice Queen: No, /I/ steal Neptune's keys, you hide Ren's stuff.

Jaune of Arc: I feel like we should change the name to match how important and complicated the plan to get these three together is.

**[ARMed and Dangerous has changed the name to "Operation Threesome"]**

The Wiz: Nice.

Little Red: Really?

Boop: I think the fuck not

**[Boop has changed the name to "Operation Golden Lotus"]**

Black Cat: Why the fancy name?

Boop: Because lotuses grow on water (Neptune), can be golden (Sun), and lotus is just calling back to Ren.

ARMed and Dangerous: Nice.

ARMed and Dangerous: Now, let's get to work.

**PM between Black Cat and Sunny Side Up: 2:55pm**

Black Cat: Hey Sun, can you get me some coffee from Dust Till Dawn?

Sunny Side Up: sure, how do you like it?

Black Cat: Neptune knows how.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: Hey babe, how does Blake take her coffee?

Blue-Haired Siren: French vanilla and caramel with 3 sugars, no milk. 

Sunny Side Up: Thanks, wanna come with me to get it?

Blue-Haired Siren: Sure.

Sunny Side Up: Ok, let me get my keys.

Blue-Haired Siren: I think the fuck not Sun, you drive like a monkey. /I'll/ drive.

**3:05**

Blue-Haired Siren: I can't find my keys.

Sunny Side Up: Me neither.

Blue-Haired Siren: Now what?

Sunny Side Up: Let's ask the others for a ride.

**"Competition"**

Sunny Side Up: @everyone@, can anyone give me and neptune a ride to Dust Till Dawn?

Ice Queen: *Neptune and I* , and I can't 

ARMed and Dangerous: Blake and I are busy studying for Oobleck's class.

Little Red: Oscar and I are busy.

Dust Bunny: CFVY is having a friend-bonding day.

Jaune of Arc: Nora, Penny, and I are stuck in traffic out of Beacon.

Sunny Side Up: @Sage@? @Lost Boy@? @Penny for Your Thoughts@?

Sage: Scarlet and I are on a double date with Ruby and Oscar

ARMed and Dangerous: OH REALLY

Little Red: fuck

The Wiz: Good going Sage.

Penny for Your Thoughts: I'm building a lot of mini robots.

Blue-Haired Siren: @Lie Ren@?

Lie Ren: I'll pick you guys up on my way to the dorms. Do you mind taking a pause there while I change?

Sunny Side Up: Nope, let's go.

Lie Ren: Be there in 5 minutes.

**PM between Boop and Lie Ren**

Lie Ren: Do you have something to do with this?

Boop: No?? Are you actually insulting me??? In my father's house???

Lie Ren: /Nora/. 

Boop: I have nothing to do with your current situation.

Lie Ren: Okay.

**[Sunny Side Up has created group: "Coffee Run"]**

**[Sunny Side Up has added Blue-Haired Siren and Lie Ren]**

Sunny Side Up: Hey, since we're in college traffic, I just need to wonder.

Sunny Side Up: How are we paying for the coffee?

Blue-Haired Siren: I'll borrow Weiss' card.

Lie Ren: If she won't let you have it, I'll pay for it.

Blue-Haired Siren: Ren no, you're already driving us.

Lie Ren: Its no big deal. I'll do it even if you want me to or not.

Blue-Haired Siren: Fine. 

Sunny Side Up: Okay, we're at the dorms, get your stuff, change,  and let's skedaddle.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Boop: They've entered the dorms, Penny are you ready?

Penny for Your Thoughts: I've already got access to microphones and audio recordings.

ARMed and Dangerous: I demand to see the fruits of my labor live.

Penny for Your Thoughts:  **hereyouthirstyhoes.link.** It's a live transcript

Penny for Your Thoughts: This is the last illegal thing I do for y'all. I don't condone this.

Little Red: As a law major, I have to say I don't condone this.

Jaune of Arc:^

Pyyrha: ^

Black Cat: Jaune you're a political science major.

The Wiz: ew poli sci. Do an actual science.

Jaune of Arc: You talk a lot of shit for someone who doesn't know 95% of their entire fucking field.

Boop: Okay everyone! Live Chat! Now!

**"Operation GLAS - Ren's Scroll"**

*door creak*

Ren: ...

Ren: Hey Nora!

Nora: Yeah?

Ren: This is my closet, right?

*rustling*

Nora: Yep!

* a beat of silence*

Ren: Is-

Ren: Is this spandex?

Ren: *sigh* At least it's about the same color proportions as my other clothes.

Ren: May as well get changed. Sun and Neptune say it's comfortable, so it can't be that bad.

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune's Scroll"**

Neptune: Weiss! Weiss?

*knock knock*

*door opens*

Neptune: Oh hey Cardin, do you know where Weiss is?

Cardin: Uh, no? Last I saw her, she was in her room going over her textbooks.

Neptune: Okay. Thanks.

Cardin: Hey!

Neptune: Yeah?

Cardin: Are you and Sun okay? Yang said something about you two not showing up.

Neptune: Oh yeah, we're fine. I just had to take a small break.

Cardin: Okay, just now that if you ever need anything, Cardinal is right here.

Neptune: ... Thanks.

*footsteps*

Neptune: Hey Weiss!

**"Operation GLAS - Sun's Scroll"**

Sun: I'm so boooooorrrred.

Sun: Why can't those two hurry up?

Sun: Oh, here's Re-

Sun: Oh fuck.

Sun: Oh no.

Sun: He's hot.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

ARMed and Dangerous: IM FUCKING DYING

Ice Queen: Ok, I had to drop off during Neptune talking to me, but wow, Sun's reaction.

Little Red: How does Ren even look?

Black Cat:  **likeasnack.jpg**

Little Red: OMG

Jaune of Arc: He's interested in them alright.

Pyyrha: Is his hair in a bun? With a lotus flower in it?

Boop: Yes.

Sapphora: Yo, he put that together though.

Dust Bunny: Is he in a crop top?

Fox-Eyed: Can someone please fully describe Ren's clothes?

Sapphora: Red crop top, white leggings, green jacket tied around the waist, green high tops. His hair's tied up in a bun, pink strand not a part of it and falling behind his ear, lotus at the base of the bun. 

Sapphora: Oh, and he put on eyeliner.

Boop: Damn, he got better at makeup.

Little Red: Hey, shouldn't one of us be watching the transcript?

Jaune of Arc:  **whoops.jpg**

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune"**

Neptune: Hey guys!

Neptune: *whispered* Holy shit.

Neptune: Yo Ren, how did you get those clothes?

Ren: Honestly? They just showed up.

Sun: Weird.

Ren: Maybe I just bought all the leggings for gymnastics and forgot about them.

Neptune: Makes sense, I used to do the same for swimming.

*car doors opening and closing*

Ren: You used to swim?

Neptune: Yeah, back in high school. I got to busy to continue, so I quit.

Ren: Oh, man. I can't even imagining quitting gymnastics.

Sun: Hey, you need to take us to one of your meets!

Ren: As long as I can go to your meets and Neptune's plays.

Neptune: Deal.

Sun: Hey, so how's it going between you and Nora?

Ren: Why do I feel like I'm being interrogated.

Neptune: Oops, sorry. Sun and I tend to get to interested in the lives of people we care about.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Boop: HOLY SHIT

ARMed and Dangerous: Yo that's so pure and sweet.

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune's Scroll" -3:30pm**

Neptune: I still can't believe I knew you this long and I didn't know you liked country.

Ren: I can't believe you're still friends with him after learning he likes country.

Sun: But it's gay country! It doesn't count. We're here by the way.

Ren: Alright, get the fuck out my car.

*car doors opening and closing*

Sun: Ok, Blake's is a-

Neptune: French vanilla and caramel with 3 sugars and no milk.

Ren: Do you guys wanna get something too?

Neptune: Dude, it's Weiss' card.

Sun: Hey, she won't notice.

Ren: Come on Neptune, don't be a spoilsport.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Boop: Holy shit he's being seductive.

ARMed and Dangerous: Wow, you were right when you said Ren knew exactly what to do when it came to flirting.

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune's Scroll"**

Neptune: One french vanilla with 3 sugars, no milk. One rasberry latte with 1 sugar, light milk.

???: Will that be all?

Sun: One Banana Blast smoothie.

Ren: One chai tea, 4 sugars, heavy cream.

Neptune: Whoo, you really like sweet foods, don't you?

Ren: Don't let Nora know, but I generally hide some of my pancakes before I bring them out for everyone.

Sun: Oh yeah, the Beacon-famous pancakes.

Neptune: You should sell them.

Sun: As long as Neptune and I get some for a discount!

Ren: *laughs*

Ren: You two can get them for free.

Neptune and Sun: Nice!

???: Here's your order.

Neptune: Thanks.

Sun: Hey, I'll take it.

Ren: You sure? It looks heavy.

Sun: Ren, I have to hold another person to the ground while they're fighting back. I think I'm fine with stationary drinks.

Neptune: You guys wanna sit here and hang out for a bit?

Ren: Sure.

Sun: I have nothing else to do.

Neptune: Ok, there's a table over there.

Sun: Can you imagine, three athletic guys hanging out in gender-neutral clothing at your local coffee shop.

Neptune: I can't believe we're reduced to eye-candy for everyone when you put it like that.

*laughter*

Ren: Wait, Blake's coffee is going to get cold.

Sun: Aw. We should give her her coffee, and then just hang out in your room.

Ren: Okay, lets-

*tapping*

Neptune: Ren? Are you okay?

Ren: Is there, there,  *throat clear* there another way out of here?

Sun: Side door, this way, come on.

*door opening and closing*

Neptune: Nearly at the car.

*car doors opening and closing*

*car cranking*

Sun: Ren are you okay to drive?

Ren: I'm moderately better than I was earlier.

Neptune: That's not answering the question.

Ren: No. Does anyone else want to drive?

Sun: I got-

Neptune: No the fuck you don't. I'll drive.

*car doors opening and closing*

Sun: Ren, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, but why did you space out in there?

*silence*

*silence*

Ren: Before I knew anyone in the group, besides Nora of course, I had a boyfriend. His name was Tyrian Callows.

Neptune: The crazy guy who got locked up for-

Sun: Oh.

Sun: Yeah. Wasn't his sentence 2 years-

Sun: Oh.

Neptune: *whispered* You saw him didn't you?

Ren: Let's just get back to the dorm.

Sun: Okay

Neptune: Got it.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

ARMed and Dangerous: Oh do i feel guilty as shit now.

Little Red: Okay, so Ren's abusive ex is back.

Boop: I say we break his legs.

Pyyrha: Nora, no.

Jaune of Arc: Um, guys? We aren't supposed to know this?

The Wiz: What do we do?

Black Cat: We have to protect Ren somehow.

ARMed and Dangerous: We keep this open and don't tell them.

ARMed and Dangerous: Nora, do you have a recording of Tyrian's voice?

Boop: I think so. Why?

ARMed and Dangerous: Give it to Penny so she can program an alert into the transcript whenever it pops up. If it does pop up, I want someone to alert everyone else on this chat and also Sun and Neptune.

ARMed and Dangerous: Got it?

Black Cat: This is so morally wrong, but I have to agree because I remember what he said during the fucking trial.

Ice Queen: So now we've gone from trying to get three people together from still trying to get those three together while protecting them from one crazy abusive ex?

Little Red: Sounds about right.

Boop: Operation Goodbye, Fucker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why do I do this to poor Ren? Why? -Questions I ask myself everyday.
> 
> Reminders: Domestic abuse is a serious issue that can be inflicted by any person and can have any person as a victim, there is no set profile for a domestic abuser and no set profile for a domestic abuse victim.
> 
> Also, mental illness doesn't make you more likely to be a bad person who will abuse others.
> 
> If you want to yell at me, [here's my tumblr](https://aprofessionalfan.tumblr.com). Hit me up for headcanons or bonus scenes, or drawings (hopefully of Ren's outfit because damn that sounds cool)


	9. Hidden and Seeking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's have a light break from angst, shall we? (He said as he quietly sprinkled in small amounts of angst here and there)

**"Competition" - 10pm**

Pyyrha: No one has any classes on this fine Teusday night, right?

Ice Queen: yes?

Pyyrha: Alright everyone. I know you're all in the dorms. We're playing hide and go seek.

Lie Ren: Yay.

Little Red: Welp. I can't wait for Ren or Blake to win.

Pyyrha: Rules, you'll have ten minutes to hide while Jaune, Nora, and I wait in JNPR's dorm. When your time is up, we start the hunt.  You must stay in the building. Point Breakdown:

1st | 250  
---|---  
2nd | 200  
3rd | 175  
4th | 150  
5th | 125  
6th | 100  
7th | 75  
8th | 50  
9th | 25  
  
Pyyrha: Ready?

Black Cat: WAIT.

Black Cat: Ok, I'm fine,

ARMed and Dangerous: She literally just grabbed a book and a flashlight and bounced.

Pyyrha: Go.

**10:29**

Boop: I found Blake.

Black Cat: How?

Boop: Your flashlight gave you away.

Black Cat: ...

Pyrrha: Blake's first out, so 25 points

Jaune of Arc: I found Ren.

Pyyrha: 50 points

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Jaune of Arc: Just so everyone knows: Ren was looking at the window like he just saw a ghost and looked pale.

Jaune of Arc: It may have been a false alarm but, I don't know that much that scares Ren.

**"Competition"**

Boop: I found Fox.

Fox-Eyed: HOW

Boop: You breathe loudly.

Pyyrha: 75.

Pyyrha: I found Ruby

Jaune of Arc: I found Velvet

Ice Queen: Who was out first?

Sage: I say Ruby because Pyyrha's message came in first.

Pyyrha: Ok, Ruby gets 100 points, Velvet 125

Boop:  **bluehairrightthere.jpg**

Pyyrha: Neptune's out. 150

Blue-Haired Siren: That's bullshit.

Sunny Side Up: You dyed your hair neon blue.

Blue-Haired Siren: It's not neon, it's /ocean/.

Jaune of Arc: Yang, you're not small enough to hide in the tiny storage closet.

ARMed and Dangerous: How did I last so long?

Boop: I didn't go that way yet.

Pyyrha: 175.

Pyyrha: And I spot Sun. 200.

Sunny Side Up: Bullshit

Pyyrha:  **ihavenottoldasinglelie.jpg**

ARMed and Dangerous: Sun how the fuck did you get up there?

Sunny Side Up: Skills

Lie Ren: He climbed the trellis and went through the roof, I've done it before.

Sunny Side Up: Snitch

Pyyrha: Coco wins.

Ice Queen: Where is she?

Little Red: OMG

Little Red: She just climbed out of the fridge, chugged a mug of coffee, and went back up to her dorm room.

ARMed and Dangerous: Iconic.

Pyyrha:

Name | Total Score  
---|---  
Coco | 700  
Neptune | 608  
Blake | 562  
Sun | 559  
Yang | 540  
Ruby | 500  
Velvet | 496  
Fox | 465  
Ren | 463  
  
Ren's out.

Lie Ren: okay.

Lie Ren: night.

**"Coffee Run"**

Sunny Side Up: Are you okay Ren?

Lie Ren: Can I talk to you two in person?

Blue-Haired Siren: On our way.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Little Red; Why did Sun and Neptune just simultaneously get up and walked in the same direction?

ARMed and Dangerous: Do you think they're...

Ice Queen: No

Black Cat: No. There hasn't been a freak out.

Little Red: Welp, back to the morally wrong but deemed right by the current situation and context live audio transcript.

ARMed and Dangerous: wow

Black Cat: That...

Black Cat: Accurately sums up my thoughts about it.

**"Operation GLAS - Ren's Scroll"**

Neptune: Hey, hey!

Sun: Ren! It's alright, we're here, you're fine.

Ren: He, he was-

Neptune: The window? Why are you pointing at the window?

Ren: He was there Neptune!

Neptune: Wait.

Neptune: He knows where you live? 

Ren: I never changed dorms. I thought he wouldn't be able to get back on campus.

Sun: Okay, we're going back to the apartment, and you're coming with us.

Ren: Why?

Neptune: Because you didn't meet us until after he was gone, so he doesn't know us or where we live. Do you have anything to place your clothes in?

Ren: But then he's just going to go after you two.

Neptune: Do you have anything to place your clothes in?

Ren: You guys don't have to put yourself in danger for me. I'm not that important.

Neptune: We'll talk about that later, but for now:

Neptune: Do you, Lie Ren, have /anything/, to place your clothes in? 

*silence*

*sigh* 

Ren: Yeah. *door opens* Here are some duffel bags.

Neptune: Okay. Sun, wanna help us pack?

Sun: Yeah. *rustling* Hey, Ren, don't worry, it's going to be fine.

Ren :Are you sure?

Sun: Do you trust us?

*silence*

*silence*

Ren: Yes.

Sun: Great! Now, I suggest that you pack a few things or else you may not get what you want.

Ren: Ok. I'll pack a few backpacks with other things.

Sun: I'll tell the others

**"Competition"**

Sunny Side Up: Hey, Neptune and I are kidnapping Ren to hang out with us.

Blue-Haired Siren: The manliest sleepover to exist.

Sage:? 

Blue-Haired Siren: With 3 people

Sage: @Yatsu@ @Fox-Eyed@ Come on, we have to prove them wrong.

Fox-Eyed: We're on our way.

Sunny Side Up: Please.

Sunny Side Up: Let us have this one thing.

Little Red: The One Thing.

ARMed and Dangerous: "Why? Why would you do this?"

Ice Queen: "Because it's the one thing you can't replace."

Lie Ren: Nice John Mulaney reference.

Lie Ren: But yeah. I'm staying with Sun and Neptune for a bit.

Boop: Why?

Lie Ren: My classes are closer.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Boop: He's lying

ARMed and Dangerous: Naw duh. The dorms are a 5 minute walk to the main class building.

Black Cat: How do we get Ren to trust us?

Ice Queen: We have to wait for him to. This is already a huge invasion of privacy, and if we tell Ren, he may never trust us again. We have to wait for him to make the first move.

Boop: Are you sure? We can;t find some way to clue him in on it?

Black Cat: Honestly, Weiss is right. We can't betray Ren's trust like this. We'll have to wait.

Boop: Okay.

Jaune of Arc: Nora, are you okay?

Boop: No.

Jaune of Arc: Why?

_Boop is typing._

_Boop is typing.._

_Boop is typing..._

Boop: Jaune, do you remember when we started dating?

Jaune of Arc: January freshman year.

Boop: A month after the trial, right?

Jaune of Arc: Yeah?

Boop: I didn't know that Tyrian was abusive until a week before the trial.

Black Cat: What?

ARMed and Dangerous: Wait, wasn't that a 4-month relationship?

Little Red: And didn't Tyrian's roommate say the abuse started almost instantly?

Boop: Yep. And I didn't know until I pushed Ren to file for domestic abuse. 

Boop: I also found out because Ren needed someone to drive him to the hospital, and I was the only person awake.

Boop: He came in at 2 in the morning.

Boop: 2.

Boop: And all because I never realized that the motherfucker was hurting him.

ARMed and Dangerous: And now you're worried because Tyrian is back and you don't want to see Ren hurt again, do you?

Boop: Yep. 

Boop: And now it's just. I can help Ren better now. But I can't, because he doesn't trust me enough yet.

Boop: It sucks.

**"Operation GLAS - Sun's Scroll"**

Ren: Are you sure he's not out there?

Neptune: I can check.

Ren: No!

Ren: I mean, I don't want you to get hurt.

Sun: We can run to the car quickly, Neptune drives, you and I in the backseat. Is that fine?

*silence*

Neptune: I'm good with it. Ren?

*silence*

Ren: Why are you guys doing this?

Neptune: What do you mean?

Ren: What do you hope to gain from this? Help with homework? Money? A blow job?

Sun: What?

Neptune: No!

Sun: We just care about you. You're going through a pretty shitty situation that is not your fault and we're going to help you because that's what we want to do.

*silence*

Ren: Let's go then.

**11:15pm**

Neptune: We're here!

Sun: Shhh. He's asleep. *grunt* I got him.

Neptune: I'll get his bags.

Neptune: Are, are you carrying him piggy-back style?

Sun: Oh shush you.

*kiss*

Neptune: I love you.

Sun: I love you too, you nerd.

Neptune: Intellectual. *door opening* Here, put him down on the bed, we'll take the couch.

Sun: Aye aye captain.

Neptune: Sweet dreams Ren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok: On the transcript thing:
> 
> They have the right intentions, they're just doing it the wrong way. This is either going to factor into the story or not depending on how I feel later, but this is illegal (because its without knowledge and consent) and very, very disgusting.


	10. In which the plot advances

**"Operation GLAS - Ren's Scroll" - 9am**

Ren: Hey, thanks for allowing me to stay here.

Neptune: Hey, if you keep on cooking like this, you can stay as long as you want.

*silence*

Ren: Can you not say that? It reminds me too much of-

Ren: Well, you know.

Neptune: Okay, but you have to teach me how you make these pancakes.

Ren: Got it.

Sun: Whassup y'all?

Ren: Hey Su-

*coughing*

*choking*

*whack*

*whack*

*coughing*

Neptune: Put some fucking clothes on Sun! What the fuck?

Sun: We're all men here.

Neptune: Yeah, but two of us have the decency to get dressed in more than a towel. Plus, Ren nearly died to his own pancakes because of you.

Sun: Fine, I get the hint. Be right back.

*silence*

Ren: Damn, he's hot though.

Neptune: Yeah, he's mine though.

*silence*

Ren: Wait

Ren: What?

Neptune: Wait what?

*silence*

Ren: Neptune...

Neptune: Fine. Sun and I are dating.

Ren: When?

Neptune: Since the weekend.

Ren: Oh. Well, make sure you set up boundaries.

Neptune: Oh, we did.

Ren: Be thorough. Like, what would happen if one of you wanted to add a third in the relationship?

Neptune: As long as we both like them, they can join. That was the third thing we agreed upon.

Ren: You sound ready then.

**"Competition"**

Sapphora: Oh wow.

Little Red: What?

Sapphora: You guys know Emerald, right?

Black Cat: Film major?

ARMed and Dangerous: Knows the perfect lighting for anything?

Sapphora: Yep.

Sapphora: Her and Oz were in the kitchen when this one rap beat came on.

Sapphora: And they both started rapping, but it was two different raps. At the same fucking time.

Sapphora: It was rhythmic heaven.

The Wiz: Yeah, it was nice.

The Wiz: She was a bit slow though. Remy Ma spoke faster than people realize, that's the thing.

Sunny Side Up: Ether and SHEther?

The Wiz: Yep.

Dust Bunny: Is anyone else confused?

Fox-Eyed: Velvet, come here, I'll educate you.

**20 minutes later**

Dust Bunny: Pro tip: Never piss off Nas or Remy Ma.

Dust Bunny: Battle Rap is an unholy and powerful art form.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Penny for Your Thoughts**

Blue-Haired Siren: Hey Penny, can you make me a few things?

Penny for Your Thoughts: Yes?

Blue-Haired Siren: Ok, here's what I want:

**"GLAS - Ren's Scroll" - 11:30am**

Sun: Ren?

Ren: Yes?

Sun: What are you doing?

Ren: Yoga.

*silence*

Sun: That's some extreme yoga.

Ren: Really?

Sun: You're doing perfect splits while balancing on your hands.

Ren: That's...

Ren: Pretty basic

Sun: Hold on, let me send a picture of this to the others

**"Competition" -11:32am**

Sunny Side Up:  **Renisfitaf.jpg**

Little Red: Damn.

Black Cat: Wow.

Ice Queen: Let it be known that Lie Ren did not skip any days, leg or otherwise.

ARMed and Dangerous: Wow Ren, looks like gymnastics and martial arts did you great.

Sunny Side Up: He says that this is basic.

**"Operation GLAS- Ren's Scroll"**

Ren: Sun, /this is/ pretty basic.

Sun: Prove it.

Ren: Alright.

*rustling and shifting noises*

Ren: Toss me my phone.

Sun: Are you sure? How long can you hold yourself up with one hand?

Ren: Last time we timed it, it was about six and a half minutes.

*silence*

Ren: Now can you please toss me my phone?

Sun: Here.

Ren: Thanks.

**"Competition"**

Lie Ren: This is basic.

ARMed and Dangerous: Aw man, he fell.

Lie Ren: ??? No I didn't?

Sunny Side Up: Here's your friendly reminder that Lie Ren, Ninja Badass, has changed to do a one-handed hand stand and is currently texting the group chat.

The Wiz: Pics or I don't believe it.

Sunny Side Up:  **exhibita.jpg**

Sunny Side Up:  **exhibitb.jpg**

Sunny Side Up: Is that enough proof?

Black Cat: The first picture alone is enough proof.

Boop: Where did you get green sweatpants from?

Lie Ren: I already had them custom made for gymnastics.

The Wiz: I am satisfied.

Lie Ren: Speaking of being satisfied...

Little Red: Oh damn, Ren's going to roast while defeating gravity.

Lie Ren: @Jaune of Arc@ @Pyyrha@ Why haven't you two said anything about Cardin after you learned about his crush?

Jaune of Arc: Well...

Pyyrha: It's complicated.

Jaune of Arc: We never really thought of what to do in case someone wants to join our relationship.

Ice Queen: Plus, it's Cardin! You guys remember how he treated Velvet and Jaune!

Sapphora: Weiss, you were lowkey racist until Blake called you out on it, and if there was a competition on who ruined Jaune's self-esteem, you would medal.

Ice Queen: ...

Ice Queen: Noted

Pyyrha: We'll talk to Cardin about it.

Lie Ren: As long as you do something. 

**"Operation GLAS - Sun's Scroll"**

Sun: Dann dude, that's impressive.

Ren: Thanks. Its actually really easy to hold after-

*crash*

Neptune: What was that?

Ren: Its nothing!

Sun: You literally just fell on your head and your shoulder. 

Ren: I'm fine.

Sun: Get on the couch.

Ren: Sun, its fine.

Sun: Fine, we'll do it the weird way.

*silence*

*rustling*

Ren: Sun?! Put me down!

Sun: Nope, you wanted to ignore your health, so now it's up to me to make you feel better.

Sun: Now, do you want anything?

*silence*

Ren: Can you make some tea?

Sun: On it.

**Operation Golden Lotus" - 1pm**

Penny for Your Thoughts: Ok, so

Penny for Your Thoughts:  **neptuneissmart.jpg**

Black Cat: Penny...

Black Cat: What're those?

Penny for Your Thoughts: Neptune messaged me earlier this morning and wanted me to make a device that could remotely alert someone by using a small, unnoticeable action.

Penny for Your Thoughts: So, I made these Bluetooth transmitters that are activated by tapping your shoes three times.

Penny for Your Thoughts: Once tapped, an app on your phone will send your friends an urgent text with your location.

Little Red: Wow.

ARMed and Dangerous: and NEPTUNE came up with this idea?

Ice Queen: Damn, he really cares.

Penny for Your Thoughts: And to make it even better, when I asked him what for, he said that he was worried for one of his closest friends.

Boop: If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry now. 

Pyyrha: Why?

Boop: Because Ren is going to be perfectly fine.

Penny for Your Thoughts: It's time to deliver these. brb.

  **PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Penny for Your Thoughts**

Penny for Your Thoughts: Hey, they're ready.

Blue-Haired Siren: Omw.

 

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune's Scroll"**

Neptune: Hey guys, I'm heading out!

Neptune: What happened here?

Ren: I fell doing yoga.

Sun: You missed the argument on which old Chinese family tea was going to work the best.

Neptune: Noted. 

Neptune: Anyway, I'm going to go pick some stuff up.

Neptune: Be right back.

**1:45pm**

Penny: And there you go, it's working!

Neptune: Thanks Penny! 

Penny: No problem!

Neptune: Let me just go ahead and add Sun and Ren to the alert list...

Neptune: And done. Thanks again Penny!

Penny: You're welcome!

*door opens and closes*

*echoing steps*

Neptune: Damn, how does Penny not get nervous in this car park?

*echoing steps*

Neptune: Ok, there's the car.

Neptune: And there's a creepy guy walking towards me.

Neptune: Welp.

*sounds of running*

Tyrian: Get over here!

*car door opens/closes*

Neptune: Hurry up Neptune, you don't want to die in a fucking car park.

*engine revs up*

*window rolls down*

Neptune: Either move or I run you over!

*tires squeal*

Neptune: Bye you fucker!

*silence*

Neptune: Now, how am I going to break this to the others?

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

WARNING_BOT: @everyone@ Tyrian Callow's Voice has been detected on Neptune's Scroll.


	11. something something police

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey fun fact: I know it's never said but GLAS is Golden Lotus Actual Sounds. (or Active Stream)
> 
> Friendly reminders: my tumblr is aprofessionalfan (hmu), if you want to request an extended scene (hmu), if you want to draw some fan art, tag me, and also hmu.
> 
> Basically please just talk to me, let me know how you feel about the fic.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

ARMed and Dangerous: Oh shit.

Black Cat: Okay, who saw him last?

Little Red: Wasn't it Penny?

Penny for Your Thoughts: Yeah, Neptune just left my apartment.

Penny for Your Thoughts: His car's not there.

Black Cat: He probably dipped.

Little Red: But what if he was kidnapped?!

Penny for Your Thoughts: I did just hear him shout "Move or be ran over", so he's probably fine?

Ice Queen: I just called him, he's alright.

Pyyrha: Why is Weiss the only other person that has common sense?

Sage: Okay, hold up.

Sage: One of my high-school friends just encountered an angry and violent person?

Sage: Why hasn't the police been called?

Lost Boy: The police need probable cause.

Ice Queen: And we don't have any.

**"Operation GLAS - Ren's Scroll" 3pm**

Sun: Are you sure you feel good enough to try this again?

Ren: Sun, I've told you five times already, the headaches gone.

Sun: Are you sure?

Ren: Yes.

Neptune: I'm home!

Sun: In the living room!

Neptune: Oh good, you're both here. I brought coffee and snacks.

Ren: Nice

Neptune: I also have to tell you guys something.

Sun: Yes?

*sigh*

Neptune: I saw Tyrian.

Ren: Oh.

Neptune: And he seemed to recognize me from the coffee shop.

*silence*

Sun: Ren? Are you okay?

Ren: No. Not really.

Neptune: Anything you want us to do?

*silence*

Ren: Would you two like do some yoga with me? Please?

Neptune: Wait, let me get changed out of these jeans.

Sun: Guess I should get changed too.

**"Operation Golden Lotus"**

Little Red: Hold up.

Little Red: Has anyone else read the transcript?

ARMed and Dangerous: Nope

Ice Queen: I didn't and I think Blake's trying to wash her hands of this.

Pyyrha: No JNPR has looked after we had that huge moral debate.

Penny for Your Thoughts: Nope

Sapphora: CFVY has been too busy.

The Wiz: I am too shy to pry

Sage: No.

Little Red: Ok, well, tldr: Seamonkeys is together, Ren has had bonding moments with both, and Seamonkeys has said they were fine with a third.

Boop: Whoo, break out 1/3 of the sparkling cider!

Black Cat: And let's stop stalking our friends.

**PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up - 4pm**

Blue-Haired Siren: Hey

Sunny Side Up: You sore too after that?

Blue-Haired Siren: Somewhat. But, um.

Blue-Haired Siren: I kinda like Ren.

Sunny Side Up: Oh, thank god you brought this up first.

Sunny Side Up: I like him too

Sunny Side Up: But, I feel like we should wait.

Blue-Haired Siren: Yeah, with all this chaos.

Blue-Haired Siren: Maybe that's better.

**"Competition" - 5pm**

ARMed and Dangerous: You guys wanna go out to eat?

ARMed and Dangerous: If you do, just come on over to the cafeteria

  **PM between Blue-Haired Siren and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: We haven't really done anything for a date yet.

Blue-Haired Siren: Well, we've already done a lot, as friends.

Sunny Side Up: Goddamn it, our bromance is 

Sunny Side Up: Well, we should do something here I guess?

Blue-Haired Siren: ...

Blue-Haired Siren: Sexy date?

Sunny Side Up: What are we, freshmen?

Blue-Haired Siren: I mean, it's one of the rare things we haven't done yet.

Sunny Side Up: True.

Sunny Side Up: But how do we tell Ren not to show up? "Hey, we're secretly in a relationship and we kind of want to have a stay at home date that may turn-"

Sunny Side Up: You know.

Blue-Haired Siren: Oh yeah. About that...

Blue-Haired Siren: He already knows about us.

Sunny Side Up: And you were going to tell me when?!

Blue-Haired Siren: I kind of forgot.

Sunny Side Up: You nerd.

Blue-Haired Siren: Intellectual. Now, come on, let's go eat. I'll tell Ren.

**"Operation GLAS - Ren's Scroll"**

Neptune: Hey Ren.

Ren: Yes?

Neptune: So as you know, Sun and I are dating.

Ren: Yes...

Neptune: But we've already done a bunch of things that couples have already done.

Ren: Yes, you kept on ruining the betting pool.

*silence*

Neptune: Anyway, Sun and I want to take our part in a more-Haven Academy tradition. And, um, it would be better if you slept over at the dorms.

Ren: Why?

Neptune: Just, just trust me.

Ren: Okay...

Ren: Tyrian probably wouldn't expect me to go back to the dorms anyway. I think I'm gonna tell Nora about him.

Neptune: That's great! Because I have no clue what to do about this whole situation. More help would be great.

Ren: Yeah.

Ren: I'll tell everyone in some time. But for right now, only Nora.

Ren: And maybe Arkos.

Neptune: Ah, you use ship names as placeholders too, huh? 

Ren: It's easier at times. Now, come on, Yang's probably going to interrogate us on our Halloween costumes.

**3:15pm**

Yang: Okay, what are you guys doing for Halloween tomorrow?!

Ren: That'll be 50 Lien.

Neptune: Goddammit Yang.

Ruby: Aren't we all going as fairy tales?

Jaune: What?

Weiss: It was Ruby's idea, the four of us dressing up as different fairy tale characters.

Blake: Ruby's Little Red Riding Hood, Weiss is Snow White, I'm Belle from Beauty and the Beast, and Yang is Goldilocks.

Pyyrha: Creative.

Nora: Ren and I are staying home and making candy.

Sage: Can Scarlet and I come over? We didn't plan to do anything.

Ren: Sure. 

Ren: Oh hey, can I talk to you two quickly?

Scarlet: Sure?

Ren: It will only take a minute, I swear.

Sage: Okay, let's go over here. What is it?

Ren: So, Sun and Neptune told me it would be better to stay at the dorms because, and I quote, "We want to do a Haven academy tradition."

*silence*

Scarlet: I can't believe it.

Sage: They, they totally are.

Ren: What is it?

Scarlet: Okay, so basically-

[REDACTED DUE TO INNOCENCE FILTER]

Scarlet: And that's what it is.

*silence*

Ren: Those nasty motherfuckers.

**"Operation GLAS - Neptune's Scroll"**

Jaune: Pyyrha and I are going to be Romeo and Juliet.

Ruby: Awwe.

Neptune: Sun and I are going to be Ladybug and Chat Noir.

Blake: That's, oddly wholesome for you two.

Neptune: But sexy.

Blake: And there's the kicker.

Weiss: Really guys?

Sun: Yang is going to sexify her costume-

Yang: Guilty

Sun: And didn't you go as the girl from 50 Shades last year, princess?

Ruby: YOU SAID YOU WERE A LIBRARIAN

Weiss: I can explain-

Yang: Damn, that means I owe Ren 50 Lien

Ren: Why? Weiss was 50 Shades?

Yang: Yep. How was your talk with Pirate Thoughts?

Ren: Try again.

Nora: Pirate Thoughts is the name of my The Lonely Island cover band.

Sage: That counts, pass it in.

Oz: Oh come on!

Jaune: That came out of the blue

Pyyrha: I was going to get coffee with those 3 Lien.

Nora: I'll drink it with your spirit in mind.

**PM between Black Cat and Sunny Side Up**

Sunny Side Up: Hey, why did my scroll ping with a warning about Tyrian earlier?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I haven't died! I'm sorry for forgetting about yall! I'll write a oneshot for an apology soon! (It's gonna be angst tho so brace yourself)


End file.
